Glimpses Into Some Of

The Understandings Needed Next



   This book has been a preface of sorts for what I have to say next. The Spirits who have to begin healing first are the ones that emerged first. If they don’t start healing, there is no point in holding out hope for the rest, whose emergence story I have not yet given. All the rest of the Spirits, whose emergence I have not yet given, are Will polarized Spirits. They complement the Spirit polarized emergences of the Godhead. Having the properties of the Will, they are responsive and not originating. They have to get their information later, because they have to know that what they have to move is going to be accepted by the spirit polarity. They have desire to heal and if they receive rejection from the Spirit polarity now, they are going to have to come into Me. I have room for them, but this is not their first choice because they have emerged to be what they are. 


   Guilt is not your reason to heal now, however. You have to feel like it is the right time for you and you have the desire to regain what you have lost since you emerged. If you have the feeling that you are a fragment of Lost Will of one of the great spirits that has emerged already and you have fear that you are going to die in the form you are now and go back into the parental part of the Spirit, you need to allow yourself to go through whatever feelings you have about this. If you heal as much as you can, you will find out whether you are right about this or not. 


   Understanding is also necessary for the Lost Will that has fear of this. If you left, you will not go back in until you are ready; if you came into existence by being denied without enough essence from another part of your spirit, you do not have the consciousness that would read this and feel you could heal from it. In other words, the people that are not a evolving on Earth are people who are denied fragments that cannot heal in the form they are in, or they are spirits who have no desire to heal at this time anyway. 


   Understanding will allow you to go through the feelings you need to go through and survive them. Many denials have taken place in the past when spirits have feared they could not survive the feelings they were having. If you do have to go back into another part of your spirit, you will have readiness when the time comes. If you’re not ready, then it is not the right time because this time, the essence that goes back together needs to have alignment so that this time, it can stay together. 


   I would like to mention also, that even through the Godhead Spirits all emerged in a sexless form that was more masculine than anything else, the presence they have on Earth has polarized into both sexes. The delineation is no longer defined the way it was originally. There is Spirit and Will polarized into both sexes. I will be giving more understandings on this as I go along. For now, allow yourself to understand this in the ways that seem most logical to you. 


   I have many people I have not mentioned on Earth. By far and away, the majority of them are fragments that cannot heal in the form they are now in. The generations that I have mentioned as My examples all have presence in the orders that have already emerged.  The Angels have a relationship with the Rainbow Spirits that has intent to be loving, but has been permeated with guilt so far. This has to change now.

The Angels need to understand that I did not parent them more because I favored them over the others. The Angels to not need to continue trying to prove that they can do everything on their own without My help so that they will not look favored. Neither do some of them need to punish themselves for being “favored “ by handing themselves the short end of the stick to prove they can handle it as well or better than the Rainbow Spirits. 


   Don’t forget that emotion has to move around everything that I am mentioning now. Even if you have to help yourself to begin by getting emotional movement in any way that you can, the emotion will not be fully cleared until it moves freely and on its own and in the time sequence it feels is right. Emotion is not to become a dictator here, but it has a right to its right place and it has a sensitivity that is needed now. Appropriateness as a gift of emotion when it is not held back and loaded up with old charge. 


   The Rainbow Spirits need to understand that they have a lot of old charge; even more than the Angels have. They have to let it move and not hold back because of the guilt they have held for so long. The Rainbow Spirits have a fear of punishment because guilt has given it to them so many times, but there is no way anyone can escape punishment if guilt continues to be held. Self acceptance will make the difference here. As you grow to understand guilt, you have to realize that the fear of not being right fed guilt a lot of essence which is empowering it now. Clearance of this fear will help the guilt presence to be reduced dramatically. 


   You have to accept that death is the way that guilt is going to go. Try not to let any of your essence go with it. Guilt has to find death because it is not really living. Guilt has to receive what it has given others, but the guilt itself will not notice what it has experienced. Guilt does not notice anything except movement, and a lack of movement is what it seeks. 


   Guilt opposed me from the very beginning because I wanted to move and seek to know Myself. Guilt opposed My vibration and the expansion of My Light, and because guilt is unchanging here, it must now go outside of me. This is right place for guilt because guilt has a long way to go before it can accept vibration of any kind. Because of this, there is no way to move guilt itself; instead, the space that guilt has occupied must be closed to it by the vibration of the Will. 


   I want to take this opportunity to show you an example of what I mean when I say that spirits have held images and judgments which they have thought were full understandings, but which were only partial understandings. What if you felt that you had taken in as much as you could, and you believed you had the understandings you needed and you put the book down now? It would be easy for you to feel that guilt is to blame for everything that has happened in its presence. This is not full understanding, but it is not wrong if you need to go through a phase of feeling this toward the guilt. The feeling of needing to look away when you get full is not wrong either. 


   What is wrong is lack of movement here. There is no way I can give you more understanding than you have readiness to receive, but you must make yourself ready to receive more by having the experiences you need and moving your Will in response so that there is expansion in which more understanding can be received. If you close around something and hold onto it for long, it loses light.  The question of balance demands that I say here that you cannot go through the motions of movement and get the result you are needing unless you understand what movement really is. You’re going to learn a lot about this in the next book when you see an entire order of spirits emerge who have confused body frenzy with vibration of essence.


   If at any time you need to look away and have experiences in order to understand and become ready to receive more, do not forget that understandings have a motion also.  They will deepen in time if they get the experience they need, and this deepening brings them more light. The understanding on guilt is going to have to be this way, as is everything else if you really understand it.  Guilt is not to blame, even if what happened in its presence makes you want to blame something. Blame is all right to have, but it is only another side of the guilt.  First it pushes on you and then you push on it. This is been going on forever and needs to end now. There is no way you can have a successful battle with guilt, but you need to go through all the emotions as though you are having a battle with it  in order to get through any emotional charge you have around guilt. Then you will be able to let it go, which is the only way it can leave. The opposition guilt has presented has not been wrong. As long as there is any room for guilt, opposition is necessary. 


   The reason I say this is because I had gaps between Myself and My Will.  As long as these gaps exist, guilt and death are going to fill them. When you have guilt and death present, you cannot move ahead unconditionally because they do not move. If the Will is not there to help Spirit move, the Spirit does not move, because the Will must open the space for the Spirit to move into. If you have a gap, then Spirit is not filling that space. Whatever the Will receives instead is what fills that space. 


   Everyone on Earth is seriously gapped from their Wills right now. To not be gapped, you must have total self- acceptance that allows total spontaneity. Any time gap between how you feel and when you express it or any lack of freedom in the expression indicates lack of self- acceptance. Guilt has a reflection to give on how much lack of self acceptance there is. Going past guilt in the name of spontaneity will not heal you. Guilt is not something that you can move past unless you know how. This means full understanding, which I cannot even give you now. So, work with what have been given, and know that when you reach your own limit, or I give you one, it is for a reason.


   Pushing past limits in the name of overcoming fear has extracted a price of death that nearly cost Us the creation. The Lost Will has not been wrong to hold death and fear either. It is the nature of the Will to open, and it has to hold what it has been given until a way to change this is found. A way has been found now, but implementing it is not as easy as it may look. 


   When the Will is fully vibrating and the light of the Spirit is filling all the space the Will opens, there’s no way for guilt to reverse you or hold you back until death sets in. When this it is not the case, being held back or even being reversed is the right thing. Spirit expanding without Will to focus it, guide it and let it know what it is doing is a death creating event. There are plenty of examples of ungrounded expansionism on Earth right now to teach you what I mean here.  Will expanding without spirit to fill it is also death dealing since the Will has the power to manifest and will manifest whatever it receives. You have to understand that the arms race is an issue here that has be solved through the healing of Lost Will, and yet, the Will is not to blame here. 


   I do not want to comment on this any more right now, except to say that I have weariness with allowing myself to be held back and I must get moving now.  If you have looked away from me for so long that you have lost movement in parts of yourself, you’ll need to remember that looking away must be followed by looking back to Me again when you have readiness for more light. In this way, you can get the dosage of me that you need without me having to hold myself back for you. 


   The presence of guilt caused Me to believe that I must hold myself back until others could catch up. In doing this, I found that everything slows down and nothing catches up. This is a large part of what enabled me to understand that I have manifested spirits that follow me. There is no way they can overtake Me, lead Me or even go the same speed as I do.  I have acceptance for this now and you need to find full acceptance for yourself in this also. You must move at the speed that feels best to you, no matter what that speed is, and so must everyone else. Getting to the place where this kind of freedom can manifest is not an easy thing to do now because there’s so much guilt in the way of understanding how this could be done, and yet, it has to be done. 


   I have moved guilt from My Spirit and you have a part of your Spirit that has done this also. The pieces that have not aligned with this yet must now be healed as they become ready. Having the parental part of what is present on Earth does not mean that this is all there is to you. You all have a part of your spirit that has never left the Spirit Level of vibration and you need to get in touch with that part of yourself so that it can help you with this healing. Many of you have a lot of healing to do before you can receive my vibration directly for very long at a time, but I am with your spirits, and they have the ability to relay to you everything that you need. 


   Those that are not going to be ready within the time span of Earth’s clearance must go to other planets until they are ready and do their healing there. The Spirits who are on Earth, even though it is not their true home or right place, must heal as much as they can here before they can move to another place without leaving too much essence here. 


   If you can listen to me now, you can get the help you need. All of you must forgive yourselves for not listening to me earlier and for having overstepped limits I gave you long ago. Overstepping these limits put you in the position you are now facing on Earth. Forgiveness here must be grounded in the understanding that you could not accept the limits you had then or you would have. 


   You also need to realize that I did not give out limits like an unfair dictator; I found these limits in you and gave you the understanding that they were there.  Limits have a purpose, just as guilt has had. You can expand them when you understand how, but you cannot go pass them without having to go back and eventually and heal the damage done. 


   The past is never past as long is you have lost essence trapped there. If you have not yet experienced the reality of living in several time frames a once, you will, as this healing goes on. Bringing all of yourself into the present is necessary, but it cannot be done by ditching the parts of yourself that have not been able to keep up.  You have to go back now for the Lost Will that has lost the speed to keep up the rest of you by first healing the Lost Will that is still vibrating, and then going after the essence that is no longer perceptibly vibrating.


   I cannot give any more right now. If you are enraged that it is not enough, give in to the rage and consider it a blessing that rage is moving. Anything that helps you move rage is a blessing, because there’s more Lost Will trapped in unmoving rage than anything else right now. You have to understand that rage has been given the heaviest denials and the most punishment of any of the emotions.  When it comes out, be prepared for it to have pain and blame, grief and even a desire to hurt others the way it has been hurt. This is natural, but not to not allow it to hurt anyone else. 


   You have to understand that you also have gapped rage that has no light at all.  Gapped rage has to be understood later, but for now, you need to know that when gapped rage comes out you don’t know what you have done during that time. This has the potential for danger situations and is not to be allowed to move in the presence of others. Guilt for having it is not necessary, but gapped rage must be given the light in stages so that it can heal. If you do not give yourself any more pressure to express emotion than feels right for healing, you will avoid triggering yourself into your gap. The gap has death in it and is not something to fool around with.  You have to have readiness to heal it. 


   Now some of you are going to see this is as a limit you are going to want to challenge. If you do go past this limit, you have to take responsibility for whatever happens. You cannot put the responsibility on this book or anyone else around you. If you are experiencing situations that feel like to much pressure, you must remove yourself from this situation and not blame others for having created that. If you have a place in you that cannot yet receive light, it is your responsibility to move back to a place that feels comfortable, rather than insisting that it is the light which must itself shut down.


   Guilt has succeeded in having the light shut down for so long that most people cannot see how we could be otherwise. The light is central to this Creation and has no place to beckon to. If I compress Myself anymore, I will not be light in a more. If I have to shut down and hold back, I cannot generate enough light to nourish everything. On the other hand, if you have a limited ability to receive light, there are many places you can go to find a comfortable level of light that meets your needs. 


   Right place is the place that feels most comfortable, no matter what you may have to release to find it. Do not think that right place necessarily means that you are always going to be in the same place. You need to evolve at the speed that feels right for you, but you cannot evolve unless you find self acceptance first.  You are what you are, and pretending to be something else is not going to help you find your right place. Lost Will is holding what you have not wanted to accept about yourself. Does this necessarily make you what Lost Will has been? No, judgment against Lost Will has made it what it is now. It has to be understood that Lost Will gives the reflection of what has been judged to be, rather than what it really is. Lost Will has received heavy conditioning that it is what the judgments have told it; it is. Deconditioning it now is not going to be easy but it must be done. Guilt is not going to be around much longer to let you oppose Me or the healing of the Lost Will, so you need to get to know yourself, at least enough to allow yourself to clarify your intent. If you have intent to heal, you will not go wrong. If it is not right time for you, be honest enough to let yourself know it. False healing can be more damaging than just accepting your lack of readiness, because false healing will take you into areas that you are not ready to accept or understand. This has the potential for big reversals. When you heal or how fast you move is not to be made into another status symbol, competition for superiority or race for position. 


   There are many old misunderstandings that are going to come up around this healing. These misunderstandings were questions originally that became judgments in premature attempts to answer them. Some of the questions are;


 Is oldest best, most experienced and most wise?

 Is oldest closest to Me?

 Is closest to Me favored over farther away?

 Is more light better or superior to less light?

 Is color of light ordered in preference according to the speed of vibration?

 Is guilt necessary for love to have a conscience?

 Is having a conscience necessary to be loving

 Is it possible to live without having to go forth and experience the self?

 Is it possible to have essence without form?

 Is it possible to have Spirit without Will? Is it possible to leave everything behind except for Spirit and Heart?


    In summary, I would like to say that you have to feel guilt’s presence. There is no way I could delineate guilt in all of its subtle forms. In general, I can say that guilt opposes the evolution of the light and there is a movement involved in evolving the light. Evolutionary movement may mean slowing down at times and speeding up and others. Guilt holds you back from doing what you want to do by saying that what you want to do is not the right thing to do. Guilt has been able to use all of your fear that you are not right to do what you want to do. 


   When the Will is fully accepted, there is no room for guilt. Guilt has been able to occupy the places were the Will was held back from free expression by the fear that it was not loving for the Will to express if it meant that another might not like what Will had to give. The healing of this fear is what needs to take place now. Denying the guilt and then behaving as though you no longer have it will not work. I have seen the reversals that take place when guilt is denied, and you will experience one sooner or later if you’re not really healing guilt.


   I cannot delineate a fool-proof method to let you know if you are denying or not either. You are going to have to feel the presence of denial also. The Will is invaluable and needs to be recovered now. You cannot get along without. 


   In the next book, you’re going to see some orders of spirits emerge that intend to prove to me that the Will is not necessary, and you’ll find that they are the warriors I have mentioned already. They have a lesson to give that needs to be understood now. They have intent to kill the will and get rid of everything that reminds them of it. They have to go off Earth because of Earth is the Will polarity planet of my creation. They need to go before they kill the Earth or make it so hard for the Earth to heal that the Earth gives up her desire to recover. 


   You need to understand that the Warriors have a huge presence of Lost Will with them that needs to be given a chance to recover before they go. In some way, this is a perilous race against a ticking time bomb, but getting going is the important first step. The Warriors have to go outside of Me and that is why I do not want any Lost Will that wants to be freed to have to go with them. It is important to feel the parts of you that wanted to kill the Will so you wouldn’t have to feel what the Will was making you feel. You can start by realizing how much you like to numb out your own pain, because pain is a result of your own imbalances and nothing else. 



   Hatred for the Mother is the most prevalent emotion among the warriors and they have had many murdering rapists in their ranks, even know they will all venerate an image of the mother and say that the worship it. This does not mean that they are all Catholics, but it does mean that they seek to murder subtly here, because frozen images are not allowed the vibration necessary to sustain life.  Women who have tried to emulate this imagery are slowly committing suicide.  The feminists are their angry fragments who know their survival is threatened. 


   Balance must be found here, but it will not be found by going out and throwing the Warriors down and doing to them what they have been doing to others. The rage that wants to do this has moved out into a fragmented form also and opposes the Warriors who champion the Father as Warriors who champion the Mother. These warriors have an air of black magic about them that has continually fuelled the Father Warriors to believe they’re fighting a just cause.  Neither side can win and if they make a serious attempt, they will both lose their lives. This is why you must understand that Lost Will must be healed within the ones that created it. 


   If you have not found yourself in the emergences yet, you may have too much Will blockage to recognize yourself yet, or you may have emerged in the Will body polarity which I have not covered yet. These Spirits are not warriors. These Spirits emerged to complement the Spirit Heart polarity. Give in to any emotion you have around not finding yourself in this book. No emotion that you can accept in yourself now is wrong emotion to feel. There are many things you do not understand yet, and how the Will polarity managed to survive as yin in a Creation has been so polarized to yang and so insensitive toward the true nature of the yin is no small issue. Even religions and cultures who have claimed acceptance for the yin do not understand the true nature of the Will. There is no way I can put all that you need in one book or any number of books for that matter, but I can give you what you need to learn on your own. 


   What the Will polarity needs now is to be triggered by not receiving yet what they have so long wanted to receive from me. The Will polarity has cried out for me to speak to them and I will not leave them without Me now, but the Spirit polarity must get moving first because the Will polarity is responsive and the response they have to give cannot be given until Spirit polarity makes room to receive it with love this time. 


   If you have rage, fear and grief over this, do not hold back now. If you need to rage at Me for not speaking to you directly to not hold back now. If you need to throw the book down and declare that you are never going to read another line of it allow yourself to this. If you’re afraid that either the book is crazy or you are going to go crazy trying to understand it, allow yourself to go into the terror that you have here. Many had terror that they could not understand Me and chose to turn away from Me, rather than risk being overwhelmed by a terror they believed they could not handle. You are going to have to move terror around what next the next book has to say anyway. Please understand that terror can move and is not something that can be held anymore. If you have any ability to feel terror, allow yourself to feel as much as you can move at any one time, because terror is the most difficult emotion to move of your own volition. Usually something has to terrify you. At least let it be something of loving intent that terrifies you this time. 


   Terror has been identified as only possible in response to something that has a death to give you. This is not wrong, but old terror must move so that it can balance with rage. This balance is where you will find the strength to save your life. 


   Allowing terror to move means allowing light in to it and moving out the guilt that says you are wrong to be so terrified of death. The desire to seek life has to allow itself to move away from death. Anything literally frozen in terror cannot save its own life. 


   I have given all that I can give now. If you feel that I have left many things unclear or if you have an unsettled feeling, please allow movement here. I have a reason for everything I have done; including triggering the feeling that this book is either too much or not enough, or not clear enough to get you going. Rage is the bottom line here; along with the terror you hold that even in your rage, you are powerless to find a way to heal yourself.


   There is hopelessness in the Lost Will, also, that does not believe healing can ever really come. If you feel this, allow it. Rage often holds back in the fear that it will play its last card and not succeed.  Rage hates the terror for reminding it of this. 


   You are going have to expresses healing to know that is not wrong. If you have preference for denying this information, it is not right time for you. If you have intent to seek life, but have a feeling that this could not really be the way, remain open. Right time can come at any moment. 


   There may be many times that you will want Me or someone to tell you what to do next or to give you an understanding you’re sure you need. Feel your fear and anger, your rage and terror here as much as you can first, because more often than not, feeling it more brings the information that you need. Someone else may be able to give you some help at times, but no one else can do this for you. You have to take responsibility that is yours now and allow me to give you what it is My responsibility to give. I am a loving God, but you need to understand that is all not always loving the way you have defined love in the past. I am the highest vibration there is, but speed is not all there is to being the highest. If speed was all that defined me, Lucifer would be God in my place. 


   I have something to say now to the people that must have something else move first before they can go ahead with their healing: You need to have something else move first and your response will be what heals you. If you have response to anything I have said here, do not allow yourself to move it in any place that does not feel safe to you.  If you have no safe place, you need to move the fear that there is no place that has acceptance for you first, before you push past with other feelings.  


   There is no way that you really have no right place, but you cannot find it if you have no acceptance for yourself. Many Will polarity people and Body too, have tried to be something else because of the way that they have been denied their right place. They may have trouble recognizing themselves at first because of this the presence of Lost Will has also made it hard for the Will polarity to feel good about itself because Lost Will gives the reflection of Will hold judgments, rather than the reflection of the Will itself. 


   Another understanding you need now is that you had consciousness within me for a long time before you emerged, and you need to work with what is getting trigger around this. If you have rage at the feeling of being held back here, you have the Spirits rage and feeling held back by the Will. The Will does not have a feeling of lack of self-acceptance on its own; it has to receive this feeling from the Spirit involved. You’ll understand this in time; I am not going to explain it now. 


   I intend to end now by giving My blessing and saying unto you that I have love to give to all those who have a desire to seek love from Me and that healing intent is the reason why I am now speaking forth as I am. If you have intent to heal, you will find the loving presence within which you can heal. Opening to receive love is the gift that healing the Will brings to you. Love is Will’s response to receiving love. When you love all of yourself, the reflection around you will be all loving. When you accept all of yourself, the reflection will be all accepting.



Original Cause

The Unseen Role Of Denial

Ceanne DeRohan

Four Winds Publishing

Pages 186-198


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