Some Understandings On Death
Originally, Lucifer told the Spirits that death was nothing, and he was right; death is nothing. Lucifer then told the Spirits they had nothing to fear. He sneered at the ones who feared, and many denied their fear in favor of looking brave in the eyes of others.
“You have to overcome your fear of death, “Lucifer told the spirits, and many took this in and have repeated it ever since.
Overcoming fear is important, but it cannot be done by denying it and then proceeding as though you do not have fear. Fragmenting your fear out into others does not mean that you do not have fear. If you have been dying physical deaths; you have Will essence that it is holding feelings around this.
When a person dies, it happens because there is not enough vibrational movement left in the Will to enable the Spirit to stay present anymore. When there is no longer enough movement left for the Spirit to express itself, the Spirit has been taking the route of breaking off from the parts of the self that are no longer vibrating and leaving with what still has enough movement to be able to leave.
When this spirit reincarnates, it does so with less essence than it had in the past. Essence has been lost along the way and you were going to have to go back and get it now. The Spirit essence that has remained alive does not have the experience of death within itself, so death does not seem real to it. The Spirit has to go back and get the Will essence that has experienced being taken over by death and this is the essence I am speaking about now.
When Lucifer said the death is nothing, he shamed the Will into feeling that it was not right to feel as it did about death.
The Spirit is not magnetic, and so, to it, Lucifer did not seem wrong in what he said there. The Spirit has been easily able to let go of death and rise above it. Many spirits think that they have to reincarnate to teach others how to do this. They have not realized it is their own missing parts they have to help, nor have they wanted to realize that they cannot tell these parts to do as they have done.
The magnetic Will energy has quite a different experience with death than does the Spirit, and the Spirit is going to have to feel the Will here in order to know how to help it.
When Lucifer said that death was nothing, he observed it, but he did not feel it. It was not his intent to feel anything at all. He has hatred for the Will. He is Spirit that hates Will. He had nothing but hatred for how the Will felt when it touched death, and you are going to have to decide whether you want to go his way or not.
The Will cannot vibrate in the presence of nothing without feeling the pain so extreme that it does not want to vibrate anymore. This has caused the Will to stop vibrating whenever it has touched death, or nothing. Once at a part of the Will stops vibrating, all other essence is affected and must either slow down or stop vibrating, depending on how close it is to the problem. Essence in motion cannot go against essence that is not moving without having pain that makes it want to stop moving. Holding back does not allow the vibration necessary for life, and so, once a part of the Will stops vibrating, it is only a matter of time until the rest of the Will stops vibrating. Movement, such as emotional expression or orgasm, has, in the past, intensified the pain of the essence whose vibration is touching the essence that can no longer move to open up space to receive it.
Death itself was taken and very early, before I knew what was, and the Lost will that has been holding this death has never known anything else. When I was trying to find out what I was, what was Me and what was not Me, I did not know if darkness had a substance to it that was Me or not. I opened to it, took it in and asked my Will to feel for me and tell me what it was.
I had embraced nothing, but I didn’t know it for a long time because the Will’s response to this nothingness gave Me so many impressions that it seemed I had embraced something, and I did not want this something to be part of me. I originally suppressed the Will’s response here because I could not stand to accept it.
When the Will opens to receive and gets nothing, it cannot stand the pain of its experience because it receives the complete opposite of me. The Will, in this case, is taken over by a complete lack of love, lack of light and lack of acceptance for it. No matter what the Will does, there is no response to it, and after it suffers the pain of this, is taken over by unconsciousness because there is no consciousness in nothingness. Since I did not have acceptance for the Will here, there was no way the Will could receive my light.
When the Will was first experiencing death, the Will’s terror was that death had the intent to be as cold and unresponsive as it was because it could torture the Will the most this way. Later, the will realize that there was nothing there to contact, no possibility for change or evolution and that it was totally alone with death unless it could somehow get My attention without having to move so much that it would go unconscious from the pain involved before it could tell me what was experiencing. My lack of acceptance for the Will here did not encourage her to feel that this should even be attempted, because She feared that I meant for her to suffer in this way. The reasons the Will felt this way need to be given later in the story so that you can understand them.
The Will has the terror of opening when it does not know what is going to receive because of this an initial experience of opening to receive nothing.
Lucifer, very early on, realized that death was because he sought it, not only for himself, but for me. He has used the Will’s terror of death to intimidate it and to do his bidding.
I did not realize what it felt like for the Will to open and receive nothing instead of receiving Me. Spirit cannot go outside of itself to find out, because everywhere that spirit goes, there is light. It is the Will that has the ability to go outside of Spirit and experience absence of Spirit. When the will receives nothing instead of light, the Will has to struggle in that environment until to light comes into it. When the Will feels it cannot move, light may even be poured upon it and the Will is unable to open and receive it.
The nature of the Will is expanding openness and if this is not filled with light, or even some limited form of flight such as judgments, then the Will receives whatever lack of love is magnetically drawn in.
Once the Will took in nothing in part of itself, it closed around this nothingness in an effort not to expand into it or feel it anymore. The Will did not know that by doing this, it was going to kill itself little by little, because moving essence could not pound against something that was not moving without feeling a pain that would also make it stop moving. Over time, this nothingness held in the Will has become very deeply buried beneath many layers of Will essence that have stopped vibrating.
I have never been able to fill the motionless parts of the Will with light because the Will has not been able to allow Me to touch it there. The pain in the Will has been so great when it has tried to move that it has been unsure whether it was receiving me or dying all over again. I want to clarify here that the experience of dying is not the same thing as death itself. Spirit did not understand the process the Will needed to clear itself of death, and so, did not accept the Will here. This has meant that the Will’s attempts to clear death out were not given light or love by the Spirit. This has conditioned the Will to feel that it cannot move death out the way it feels it needs to without receiving more denial.
Spirit has, for a long time, had guilt that it was a survivor and Will apparently was not. I also thought for a while that Will was seeking death and avoiding me because the Will seem to be so resistant to My efforts to give light. I have now learned how light must be given to this part of the Will to enable it to move death out. It must be done in just the right way or it will not work.
When I have tried to heal the Will of this pain in the past, I have thought it would never be free of this pain or stop nagging Me about it. I have healed most of the Will in the past, but I have never gotten the Will to release the clench of death is has been holding ever since it took in nothingness. Because of this, the Will has always gone into a reversal of its healing. This has both infuriated and frightened me. My Will has also felt rage at me for not healing Her and terror that I cannot heal Her.
At times, I have abandoned the Will here, because I did not know what else I could do. I needed space from her to handle my fear that I was inadequate and impotent to handle the problem, and I needed the detachment to lift into the overview to see how I could help Her. The Will has interpreted this detachment as a lack of love for her, as abandonment and a lack of concern for Her plight. At times, I did have these feelings, but over all, I knew I had love for Her and that I must find some way to rescue Her.
The Will has tried to handle her terror of death by giving in to it is much She could, to see if there was any way that she could accept it. She had guilt telling her She must make a place for everything or she was not unconditional loving acceptance. The Will has not found any way to lovingly accept death. After a long of trying to accept death and of hiding Her feelings about this from Me, She has approached me and told me that she cannot bear to hold it anymore. We have finally come together in the understanding that acceptance for death means knowing it for exactly for what it is and accepting true feelings here.
The Will has fragmented many times, trying to get death out by pushing out the part holding the death. These fragments are overwhelmed by the experiences they have had as a result of this. The Will has been terrified that death was an incurable disease because the more she tried to push it out, the more of it there was. This is because fragmenting to get rid of the part that held the death only created more places that were missing their essence and thus, were nothing.
The Will now knows that She has to release the death She has been holding for so long and that no Will essence that has the desire for life is to go with death when She releases it. Death has to go outside of me, and the Will knows that this must be done by a feeling of all the essence that has died and bringing it back to life so that only the empty space that belongs outside of Me goes outside of Me.
Those who still do not want to understand what life is and what death is will have to go out there also and experience the opposite of Me. It has not been pleasant for the Will to experience nothing taking over Her when the light, life and love is what she seeks. It has been unbearable torture, in fact. To clear this, the Will is going to have to express the emotions that have been held in the essence that took in nothing when it wanted to receive Me. These emotions are terror, rage and an immense grief.
In the past, when the Will has tried to move death out, no one has had acceptance for the intensity of emotion involved. Everyone, including me, has tried to get as far away from the Will as possible when these emotions have come up. The fragments holding death have been shunned in the same manner. Guilt has made some people go toward this instead away from it, but they have not gone with love and understanding they think they have had, and so their presence has been helpful, but not healing.
Deconditioning the Will here is not an easy thing to do, but must be done and must be done in love and light. The Will cannot be ordered to stop fearing death and see that it is nothing because the Will has felt nothingness and knows the reality of it better than anyone else who just looks at it ever could. This is why we must have both understanding and feeling to have life at all. I have objective understanding but without Will, there is no love. The Will has love to give in response to My light and it is not wrong to assume that without Will presence, there is no love. Lucifer has personified the hatred that results from a complete denial of the Will.
Original Cause
The Unseen Role
Of Denial
Pages181-186